People Hate Me

People talk behind my back. They will go to great lengths to defend themselves in order to appear like a victim of something I never did. A particular person has not liked me since they day they met me. I've dealt with this all my life. How about you?

It seems I'm an outcast, much more since I became a Christian (years ago, at 15). I attract rejection and hurtful people. Not sure why.

Do you? Or are you generally surrounded by people who love and cherish every thing you do?

People can be harsh, critical, and judgemental. Sadly, even those who love Christ can be the same. Hate and unforgiveness seems to run rampant in this land. Justice must be served. An eye for an eye! You hurt me, I'm going to hurt you, or better yet, just keep my distance and ignore you because I wasn't made to be a doormat.

But there is another side to this. It's called love, forgiveness, mercy, grace, and above all, being a peacemaker. Is it easy? No. Is it a road of suffering, rejection, and painful efforts to love those who persecute/hate us? Yes.

So, how can we show love to those that hate us? How can we show love to people who gossip, slander, and criticize our genuine acts of love? How can we love people we may not necessarily "like?" Is it even possible to dislike someone, but love them?

First of all, let me say this, I do not think people should stay in a abusive relationship because they are called to love, BUT I do think that mercy, forgiveness, and love can be shown to the abuser. And think about this, if Jesus were here today, don't you think he would have been considered a doormat? I'm not saying we should seek out opportunities to be stomped on, but I am saying that suffering is not something we can avoid just because we are Christians. In fact, often when we find salvation through Jesus we are stampeded by attacks, suffering, and hardship. It's inevitable. WE HAVE AN ENEMY!

Anyway, let's go through 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, the classic love passage written by Paul, and look for practical ways to apply love to our grimy relationships.

Throw Away Expectations
When we love those who hate, abuse, reject, or slander us we need to get rid of our expectations. Yes, it would be wonderful to confront someone in love and restore a relationship with an "I'm sorry" and an "I forgive you," but that's not always the case. Sometimes people don't want to change.

People often want to be accepted for who they are and not change because someone isn't comfortable with something they have done or said. They are stuck in their ways, and if you have stepped out in love and they do not seek change or restoration that is not in your control.

Through patience we should pray for these situations. We should not expect immediate results, but instead, prayerfully and patiently seek God and wait for Him to move in the person's heart. But we love through these times. Even if someone is ignoring us and it hurts, love. Send a card, and if it gets sent back, okay, you're trying. You are loving and following in the footsteps of Jesus. You cannot control someone else's actions, so don't expect anything from anyone.

A Hug for an Eye
Yeah, that's right. I said a hug for an eye. Cheesy, I know. But hey, it's true. Bonhoeffer states in one of his books that love is the best thing to combat evil. Kindness may not end wrath, but slapping someone who slaps you sure isn't going to help the situation.

Welcoming someone into your home, inviting them to dinner, even if you know they will deny your invitation, is offering kindness. This isn't always easy, and it cannot be faked. You can try. You can say, "Well, I'll be nice to her when I see her, but I'll never like her."

Okay...

Tell that to Jesus when he died for people that betrayed him. He LOVED beyond any love we will ever be able to give. Kindness may not come natural, but we can pray for genuine love and kindness. A love so much like Jesus' love that we can smile and hug someone even when we know they hate us.

It's saying, love erases like. There is no like or dislike when love enters the picture. There is only LOVE. Genuine, Jesus-centered, true love.

To be continued tomorrow...