SEE YA

Well, I'm done blogging. For those of you who think I'm inspiring, it's all in your head. :) I'm tired of my own words. I want His.

Here's some profound thoughts I'm going out with:

Have a plate of meatloaf with red hot chili peppers and a side of korn, black eyed peas, cake, and cream.

There's no doubt the beatles are on the bush pondering nirvana and trying to guess who said YES.

There are 112 reasons why smoke puffs in druid hill park with BIG outlaws and yeah, carry your mase.

The backstreet has spears that get in sync with 98 degree temperatures in maroon genies in bottles.

We have many confessionals by the dashboard where we ponder juliana theories, but the only thing we learn is that jimmy ate the world and saved the day on thursday.

Bye all. It's been fun!

Blogging Buh-Bye?

I made my blog private because someone was reading it who I thought probably shouldn't be, and during that time I wondered if I'd ever blog again. Until many of you lovelies emailed me and told me to come back.

But here's the thing ....

I've been convicted lately of my self-centeredness in all areas of life, from children to makeup to my relationship with God. I've been asking Him to strip all selfishness from my life and replace it with a desire for Him and in turn, a pure and humble heart.

It's hard for me to desire humility. My pride wants so many things of this world. But my soul wants Christ. In order to gain more of Him, I have to let go of things I'm holding onto that are keeping me from Him.

I feel like blogging may be one of those things. More than Desire is different, it helps marriages stay alive through the devastation of porn. But personal blogging?

I got rid of Twitter and Facebook a few weeks ago. I've been wanting to do that for months, but so many people told me that I should keep them to market Exposed. But I don't want to market Exposed. I know this is crazy to all of you authors out there, but I don't want to market Exposed in ways that glorify myself or toot my own horns. I will market Exposed when I feel God leading me to glorify Him in some way, whether an interview or whatever He brings my way. But Facebook? Twitter? They feel so self-centered. So ME.

I don't want me.

So, I got rid of those and it felt so good. Then, when I took the blog down temporarily I thought, "Why do I have a personal blog anyway? What do I have to say? Why do I think people need to hear my words and my thoughts and my heart? Isn't my blog a little centered on self? Doesn't it make me think I'm important, so important that the world must read my thoughts?"

Now, it's one thing to write something like More than Desire or a book or something that helps the world in some way. But to share my heart for the entire world to read?

I don't know.

I'm not sure how I feel about personal blogging anymore. So ... this may be my last post for-evah. Or it may not. I'll see where God leads my heart. Either way ... I really, really want more of Him. That is my deepest prayer. More Jesus.